(Cross-posted from wls)

I briefly Facebooked this yesterday, but yesterday (after standing in line in a government building, with four children, for three hours*,**), I stopped at Mercy on the way home and ran in to weigh in, since my attempt of Friday had been foiled by the government holiday. I hadn't been in in about two months (well, I'd been in once, but my weigh was a few pounds up so I pretended it had never happened), and my loss has been slow lately (about 60 pounds this past 12 months), and I wasn't expecting much because my pants have felt the same since Christmas. I mean, I could have gained. But when I hopped on, the number was... 216.6. I don't process numbers well or quickly, so I just saw the "6" and thought, "I still need four more pounds to have lost 200 pounds." Then I thought, "Wait... is that a number in the teens?" I got on and off four times, and it stayed the same. Go figure.

So I'm officially 200 pounds down. 205 (.4) to be precise. Thanks, DS! It's slow, but I'll freaking take it.

I wonder how much weight I'll have to lose until I'm not a fat girl anymore? Who knows. Anyway. The next number I'll point my nose at is getting below 200 pounds. The last time I weighed 202 was in 1990, when I still lived in DC. Huh... that'll be like I lost the whole outside layer that experienced grad school. I wonder if pain and anxiety are fat soluble? Have they been dumping back into my system as I lose the weight?

I thought I should celebrate, so after walking into TJMaxx and spending 3 minutes picking the pair of sandals closest to the ones that had just broken on my feet that morning (and wearing them up to the register, removing them only to pay and have the big white clip removed), The Beetle and I went to see the new Ice Age movie. So painfully boring, and one of the sweetest things ever, sitting with my laughing child in a movie seat I could fit into. With her on my lap.

--
*People were totally glancing at me and I know they were thinking, "At least she'll be going through menopause soon."
** And they were good as gold, I tell you no lies.

DS in two stages, November 2007 + April 2008
Dr. Alfons Pomp, New York Presbyterian Hospital
5'2"
422/377/298.2/216.6/healthy-TBD
Highest Weight/First Surgery Weight/Second Surgery Weight/Current Weight/Goal Weight

I'll post for real sometime soon, I promise. Suffice to say, I'm alive and holding it together.

Meanwhile, here's an "NSV"* from this evening: something I'd never been able to do with my kid before:



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= Non-scale victory. The ones that count.

A woman who can do this? Could probably make me a pair of pants that fit well. Out of eyelash yarn.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/england/7947984.stm

from the wise and well-informed fattest

(This video has subtitles in English that I don't have a way of transcribing... it shows a series of people with varying physical and mental challenges and says they're not to be pitied, difference is normal. The ironic lack of access is not lost on me.)

Even in the depths of protracted flu-like illness, there lays within each of us the strength to stretch out a trembling hand, grip a tiny phillips head screwdriver, and build a "Robug".

You go, Beetle! (And she's better now. Phew!)

Although I had socked away $500 for the professional organizers' conference in Orlando next month, finding out the hotel room is $200 a night for three nights made the decision for me. It's fine: I already sent the $500 off to my credit card and another bill. Money does not get dusty around here. :)

The Beetle is home sick today, and so I'm tending to her sweaty form, and making her read books about robots for her science fair, because I'm an animal. Please know, I listened to four hours of "Oliver" wafting from her room, then opened a can of chicken soup and microwaved it for her before I made her work.

I'm also conquering hideous items on my to-do list, like calling the insurance guy and asking why I'm still getting collections notices from the hospital. Oh, that reminds me, have to call another insurance guy to ask why I haven't gotten the estimate for what they'll pay to fix last week's car accident damage. I'm off to make that call!

Don't envy me.

If you've ever heard me complain about anything, it may well have been my kitchen ceiling. It was aesthetically loathsome to me, so I made it even more so by ripping down a dropped ceiling, then taking a looong time to get a new one up. But, thanks to my brother Joe and other forces for good, it has been completed, and I painted it over the past week, and except for some manner of specialty switch plate cover I need to hunt and gather, it is a joy and a delicious slice of completion in my life. The pictures are dull, but I'm posting them anyway.
( Kitchen Ceiling Befores and Afters )

On a different note, although my weight loss is much slower now, it continues, and apparently my body responded well to running up and down a ladder for two weeks. I lost about 7 pounds during that time period, and as of this morning I'm 238.8, or over 183 pounds down. My shoulder area is getting pokier, and my ass is getting, well, lower. I bought my first white bra today in about a million years, because I'm actually wearing shirts that are of a color that the black ones show through. And since I'm not Sandra Bernhardt/Madonna, and this isn't 1985, we're not going to that place anymore.

I'm just reporting in to say that I'm having an awesome day. I got some nice cuddle time in with the kid this morning, then I buckled down and have gotten all this work done (including a new book review up at my org site: http://www.mmartone.com/?page=1). I've figured out my scanner so it's not a psyche out obstacle any more (I know, duh). I'm making a systematic file of all my blog entry ideas for work, and I have some good leads on computer backup strategies (thanks, ironman!), which has been preying on me.

::runs to kitchen::

And despite the fact that I just spaced out a pot of pudding on the stove which led to a bit of a moment right there, I'm still happy. I'm also on my fourth John Lee Hooker CD in a row, which has got to be facilitating the righteousness.

Hope you all are enjoying your days, vacation-y or not.

So here I am, being a responsible home office type and realizing that my random and infrequent stabs at backup are inefficient at best, and a prescription for heartache at worst. My dream would be to backup my files offsite, and the types of files most critical to backup are my photos (can't find the gigs, but 8137 pix), my music (over 63 gigs), and my work files (not so much, but increasing numbers of Excel files).

I'm seeing Crashplan: http://www6.crashplan.com/consumer/features-compare.html

and Backjack, which seems prohibitively expensive, considering how much music I have: http://www.backjack.com/faqs.html

I'm suspicious of free plans (should I be?), and I'm willing to pay, but I really can't afford $1000 bucks a year because I can't stop taking pictures of weird things.

Anybody have any advice?

Apparently, when I'm not being forced by "the man" to sit in front of a computer all day, I only sit in front of a computer the bare minimum of time it takes me to make sure I haven't missed an important email. I've been skimming Facebook and LJ, but the absence of forced desk time has really cut into my reflective ramblings. I'm quite sure you miss all of that.

So what's been filling my days? Oddly, work. I've been getting a slow but steady stream of organizing gigs, and I think the people at the thrift store where I bring most of the donations are beginning to view me as their cash cow. I deeply enjoy my days of sitting with people and helping them sort their physical (and sometimes their internal) stuff. I also enjoy a much more physical relationship with the work than I had in years past: I can really heave the stuff around and go up and down stairs with much more enthusiasm, and fewer thoughts of imminent death than I did 175 pounds ago.

On the weight front, I've stalled a bit, but that's cool. A friend and I are scheming on some means of motivation. I'm not gaining; I could just be making more healthful choices. I need to stay more present with my food choices even when I'm busy or running late. I'm not living the same "bring a lunch to the office" lifestyle, so I need to re-imagine the strategy. That said, I'm also not snacking all day in front of the computer, but I do eat when I drive distances/when I'm driving tired. Maybe I should just make a No Car Eating rule. Hmm.

When I'm not working, I'm doing my roughly-8-hours-a-week vollie gig in the ESOL program. That continues to challenge me, because it's not something I've done before. I'm freshly embarrassed that I only speak one language. Granted, I speak it a lot, but that's not the same.

The Beetle and I went to DC for the inauguration. Hopefully, time will blur the memories of how cold it was, and leave her with the sense of importance of having witnessed history.

( Tired of important, quality photos of the inauguration? Step right up. )

Besides that wee trip, it's been ordinary. I've made some changes to my office that have made it a little tackier, but more conducive to business (curtains across the open shelves, because the contents were so visually distracting). Been sneaking in a few books lately; mostly YA. Until today I thought I'd never see my driveway again, but there's been a minor thaw, and I spy bits of pavement. I haven't made any exciting new recipes lately, but I've been hankering for lamb, so once we've eaten down the freezer, I'm going shopping. Of course we'll have to eat those "Buy One Get Two Free" kielbasas first. The kids are all well, and I'm grateful for each day I get with them. The Beetle came back tonight from a day out with two yarmulkes on: I'm not sure what that means.

And that's me in a nutshell.

Oh... and I'm on Facebook now, although I'm not a big poster. I'm just there under my real name and there's a picture, so I'm easy to find. Add me if you wish. :)

I'm working at being a good worker from home. Staying focused.

That said, I'm also pumping through some laundry, and this morning I actually had an entire load of "pinks."

I didn't take many pictures over the holidays, because I'm working on enjoying the moment instead of documenting it. Plus, my neph, J., took a bunch of family photos, so hopefully I'll have access to those. That said, there were a few things I thought I'd share.

( Stockings, a statue, and a shitzu )

I'm back in town from about a week away in Ohio visiting with my people. I've missed hearing how you all are, but it will kill me to go back and read a week and a half of back posts, so I'm starting fresh from today. If anything big has happened, will you let me know?

Peace.

Today I'm happy that I was able to knock out these balls for the babies, yesterday afternoon and evening. (Now I just need to bang out some stockings.)

(photo: four stuffed balls, in decreasing size, the largest the size of a small round watermelon, each made of six panels of brightly colored and/or patterned fabric)

( Rolling along )

Extra: anything can be decorated for the holidays. Including the nine computers from which I need to strip the hard drives for a client.

(photo: stacks of computers with four tiny artificial trees on top of them: green, pink, silver and black)

Today I'm happy that I just weighed in and am in the 240s.

It makes me happy that due to a dollar store clove score 6 months ago (socked them away in the freezer), I was able to afford to make pomander balls for the first time since kindergarten.

(photo: coffee table with container of whole cloves, skewer, and orange in the process of being studded with cloves)


(photo: closeup of orange with cloves stuck into it in a linear pattern)


(photo: closeup of orange with cloves stuck into it in a spiral pattern)

I felt punky this morning but I still got a boatload of errands done, and got out my last two holiday cards, and can hear my sweet four month old friend waking up, and now I get to hold her and watch her smile at me.

I'm happy that I got to work today and make money, even though Western MA was largely shut down because of the threat of snow, then actual snow. If mommy doesn't work, mommy doesn't get paid. Plus, this new client is really nice and I really enjoyed working with her and her husband. Plus, I got home alive. All good!